I used to be addicted to playing the Ouija board. I have owned four of them in my lifetime and don’t plan to own another since I got rid of the last one that literally fell from the sky one day (or appeared to have, at least).
But like all addicts, I can never really say never, can I.
I don’t really know why I became hooked on the devil board to begin with because to be honest, it’s pretty boring for the most part and, like internet surfing, is a huge time thief. It’s also a great distraction from reality which is probably why I was drawn to it. My reality sucked and back then, we didn’t have the internet or even decent video games to distract us.
So we did things like cruised the strip, drank and smoked weed and tried to contact the devil to pass the time.
I got my first one as a birthday gift when I was just fourteen and thought it was cool. I wasn’t afraid of it, despite everyone telling me I should be. Honestly, I didn’t think it was anything to be afraid of. It was made by Parker Brothers, for Christ’s sake! I wasn’t afraid of Monopoly or Yahtzee, so why would I be afraid of Ouija?
At first, I tried my best to prove that it was all one giant, over blown fake. That backfired pretty quickly, which scared the shit out of me.
Soon I found myself addicted and trying to convince everyone else that it wasn’t fake.
The first clue I had that there was a supernatural presence interacting with me was when my friend Stacey and I were at my house, alone, playing until the wee hours (by black candlelight, of course!). We had asked a million questions and had run out of things to say when we began bickering over who was moving the thing, accusing each other of doing it.
Eventually the board suggested we take a break and he would prove that it was real (he told us to call him Guy by that point so we did).
He told us to go to the kitchen to get a cup of coffee and to leave it facing down on the bed with the planchette on top.
So we did, which is funny, now that I look back. We didn’t listen to our parents but we did whatever the board told us to do, just like good little children.
The bedroom window was shut and locked and the bedroom door was closed. We could see the front and back doors as well as down the hall to the bedrooms the entire time and no one had come in or out of the house while we got our coffee and chatted at the dining room table for a bit. We debated what was really going on if neither of us were really the one moving it.
We weren’t scared, just curious.
As soon as we walked back in the room and saw that the board had flipped itself facing upright with the planchette on top exactly where we’d left it, we were both convinced. We knew we’d left it facing down, like it had suggested, and instead of being freaked out like we probably should have been, we wanted more.
Stacey and I both quit playing after a lot of our friends started dying and we started to wonder if it was the board, which scared us, but I kept getting gifted new ones without asking for them and kept getting pulled back into it. She swore it off after she nearly died in a freak car accident with one of our good friends (who did die) so I had to convince my boyfriends to humor me, which they did.
By the time I was sixteen I played it every single day. I used to throw huge parties at my place and break out the board for fun and one night, there were ten or twelve of us all packed into my bedroom, getting high and drinking and the energy was crazy. The planchette was moving like lightning, spelling out dirty jokes and making everyone laugh. Then things got serious when I was accused by someone of faking it, as usual. Soon one accuser became two and then three and then…
So I thought of a clever way to prove the naysayers wrong.
“Hey, what color underwear is everyone wearing?” I innocently asked the guy on the board.
One by one, he went through each of my friends and told us all what color and even what type of underwear we were wearing. By the time there were only a couple left, the mood had changed to nervous anticipation and everyone was pretty quiet, waiting to hear the answer.
By the time my friend Manuel was the only one left, he was sweating.
“You guys are all in on this!” he accused. “This is bullshit,” he said. “I’m not kidding, you guys, knock it off!” he warned. The room was dead silent by now. Everyone was a bit freaked out, I could tell.
When the board slowly spelled out N-O-N-E his face turned ghostly white and he got up, ran out of the room, ran straight out the front door and down the street back to his house where he called me, gasping for breath.
“HOW.. THE FUCK… DID YOU KNOW… I WASN’T… WEARING ANY…. UNDERWEAR?!” he said, his voice filled with a mixture of incredulity and fear. I put him on the speaker phone so we could all hear.
I hadn’t known until the Ouija board guy told me and it was funny as hell.
All I could do was laugh and say back to him “why the hell aren’t you wearing any underwear, you weirdo?”
To be continued….